The Escape
I have always worked hard and tried my best but now that I’m taking home the sort of money I used to only dream of I’m left dreaming of ways to escape
So I work in a big paced industry with safety a high priority in a highly unionised company. So unionised that managers are given the guidance to manage but are essentially left out to dry when things don’t go too well.
Complaints are every single week. About each other, why they should be expected to take on certain tasks and as part of a complaint a request could be that they’d like you to no longer work with them
Sound scary? Stressful? Well that’s only the half of it. The workload is extremely heavy. The pressure on senior managers is that their behaviour to get things done has been shown to be bullying. In fact has left people in tears.
I recall meeting a member of staff who seemed capable but was extremely lacking in confidence. Physically shaky at times. I now understand why. It was an unrecognised high level of senior management bullying behaviour. The saddest part is the bully did not recognise this in them and no one had the guts to speak up and put a permanent end to it
What should good management look like? Supportive, confident, with the headspace to be assertive but also caring all the time. Working hours into your own time on a regular basis is not conducive with this. And things are changing further which will result in an even heavier workload. It’s so bad that I wonder whether this is the way they intend to increase natural wastage? You know? Many may simply think right I’m out. it won’t just be those close retirement though. Or those who weeent performing anyway. Remember those not performing will be afraid to try the outside world because they know they will not survive.
What will happen as does in most of these situations is that the best, the most reliable will be the ones who will finally see clearly and walk. This will feel like managing to climb out of the flames and back into the frying pan but the pan will be on a comfortable low heat with tepid water in for a lovely, leisurely swim. Remember? Now everything else is easier…
This is the point where money no longer matters. You remember why you chose to work and it was not to be able to give every waking hour to it. You also remember that the advert did not ask that of you either
You look at the many other ways that processes purposefully use the individual and essentially hamper genuine progression and development. That’s another story but right now, I just need to make 30mins tea time in my diary and I will use it to draft my letter of resignation. I need to have it ready to send as soon as I find myself unable to get up and make my way to work.
I know that really at this point I should be calling in sick and trying to get some counselling and real support but I’m not like that I’d just leave and hope that the act of doing so will fix everything. The one thing I know for certain is I will be happier, I will survive and I’ll have the opportunity to follow my dreams
So no I won’t be … wait I will be using a five bar gate (a few) to count down the days till I leave, and it will feel like using a small, thin plastic spoon to dig a tunnel out (I realise I’ve already been doing that) and it will be like running in the first few days because I know that when you overuse people you do miss the accuracy etc they brought but I also accept that they’ll find someone else in no time at all. That’s worklife. I do know that my decision will reduce the likelihood of me collapsing in an unbreathing heap at my desk or even at the bus stop
And then maybe first sometime on a dessert island to find myself, heal myself and make new, good plans that only I control. Ps it’s worth noting that despite everything i know for a fact that I am in control of my destiny and that should I stay longer than I need to I will have done it because I’d allowed myself to lose that control